Ok so I have been seeing a guy since August. After splitting up with my fiance and father of my child in January, this is the only guy that I have even felt like was worth getting to know. I fell for him so fast. He is outgoing, funny, smart, and charming.
This guy still wont call me his girlfriend...yet he says he isnt trying to see other people. I mean....really? 5 months and you dont refer to me as your girlfriend? I stay at his house 5 nights a week and he stays at mine the rest. We are always together unless im at work. Igo to work at 6 and come home at 3 or 4am....so it would be easy for him to be seeing other women while im at work.
Recently I havent been soupset with the whole title thing....he tells me he loves me...and I believe him. Well, I have a really bad habit of being nosey....like most females....looking through phones and emails. I know its bad...but I cant help it. A couple of months ago I found a text of him inviting a girl to a basketball game....I said nothing and she never answered so later that night he asked me to go. I eventually told him I saw it and of course the whole "female friends" bs came up. Whatever. I ignored it. I also found out After we started talking (about 2 weeks after) that he had a girl over and they were in his room making out (I saw a picture....how enjoyable let me tell you.) I also ignored that because we had just began talking and feelings werent involved then.
Well, feelings are involved now. I love him with all my heart but I know I need to cut it off with him...yet Icant and I dont know why. About a month ago we went to a football game together. We got in an argument because he let a random drunk girl grab butt...and didnt say anything to her. I felt really disrespected. I walked away he kept calling my phone. I ended up going back to the hotel. I walk on the balcony and a girl pushes away from him really fast. I could have swore they were kissing. It was a shared balcony and he kept saying the guysin the other room brought her up. Yet she was following him around and asking to use the bathroom in our room. So we got in another fight about that. Back to my bad habit.....he left his facebook open the other day....duh, you already know Im going to look. What do you know!? The girl from the balcony is in his inbox. HMMMM....thought he didnt know her. He was saying sorry about the night on the balcony and thathe brought a friend and she acted crazy. He was referring to me. He also gave her his number andtoldher he wanted to take her out. WTF. She wrote back with her number and said she would like that. This was written almost a month ago..Nov14th actually.
I felt like I was going to throw up. He knows I love him...and knows I love him alot. Now I know why he wont say im his girlfriend. Hes playing me and using me. I dont know why I cant break it off with him. I think its because I think maybe I can change his mind about the whole girlfriend and getting hurt (thats is reason for not having a girlfriend in 5 years). Maybe its because I feel like if I did end things..he wouldnt care. I would want him to care....andIwould want him to miss me and realise he messed up. I also want him to know I saw those messages....but I dont know how to go about doing that without starting a fight. ugh...this blows.
So I dont know what to do....Ineed some advice...but please put yourself in my shoes before just saying whatever sounds good. Things are always easier said than dont.
